The Top 5 Tips For Dating A Disney Princess:
5) Always, ALWAYS Hang Out In The Woods (Be Out-Doorsy)- Where does the princess always (well, almost always) meet the prince? IN THE WOODS!!! The princess has always managed to get herself into some manner of mischief, there's always a chase seen, and then BAM! she crashes into the prince and Presto! love at first sight. So what does that tell us as guys (or princes...... OK never mind, that's kinda weird)? That we need to be in the woods. Bust out the flannel shirts and tents my man, it's camping time! (Please nobody read this and decide to go live in the woods waiting for some girl to get lost and then you marry her...... Please, just don't.).
4) Royalty is Always a Plus, But It Isn't Necessary (...... And We'll Never Be Royal)- While royalty does seem to have an affect on all women, it isn't necessary when it comes to dating these Disney Icons. We know that from Aladdin, Frozen, and Tangled, the royal women of Disney aren't just interested in noble men. They like hard-working men, who strive to their convictions, and-...... OK they also like bad boys. Aladdin and Flynn were both thieves. But, the princess's like men with heart, and that should tell us street-rats and icemen that we have a chance.
3) Patience is Key (Culture-Shock)- While these lovable heiresses to the thrones are delightful and cheery, they also are, uhm, what's the word..... inquisitive. Many of them have been withheld from society (some have been under the sea, some trapped in castles, some in a coma, and some just confined to their palaces). They aren't known for understanding what goes on beyond princess life. Ariel thought a fork was a comb. Jasmine didn't know that you had to pay for food. Anna thought it was perfectly fine to marry a "prince" that she had only known, oh, say, 3 hours at the max. They need to be taught what it means to live beyond their palace walls. Which means they need patience.
2) Don't Rush To Meet Their Parents (New Meaning to the Term Monster-In-Laws)- While their daughters turned out wonderful, not every princess comes from wonderful families. In fact, many of the misfortunes from their pasts come from their families. Rapunzel's mother was the one to lock her in her tower, while Merida's family tried to have an arranged marriage. Princess Anna may have lost her parents at a young age, but her sister tried to cause the second ice age. Cinderella...... well, her step-was a real piece of work. And while King Triton is a good and noble king, he isn't known for being to kind to visitors...... imagine dating his daughter. So don't rush to meet the parents...... It can wait.
& finally
1) You've Got To Be an Animal Person (They love them some Pets)- Pets pets pets pets pets, these girls like some animal companions. And they range from almost everything: chameleons, reindeer, dragons, crickets, horses, pigs, bears, tigers, ..... it almost never ends. This may not seem that big of a deal, but these critters are fiercely protective. Most of them have the ability to end your life. Another reason to be an animal person is because these ladies have a deep connection with these pets, and animals have very keen senses. Basically, they'll be able to pick up on what your intentions are with their master. They're cute and cuddly (well some of them) but they mean business.
So there's my tips. Take them for what you will. Obviously I'm not saying that it's possible to date fictional characters, but these do apply to real life. Girls don't go for the guys that ALWAYS play it safe. Sometimes the girl needs to see that you're willing to save her from the dragon, or just help her notice that someone sees her more as just a "princess"........ I don't really know what else to say that won't sound cliche. Just note that this little slice of Geekery is applicable in the real world, and that "every girl deserves to be treated like a princess" (but not the way Bowser treated Princess Peach, cause that's completely contradictory to the point of the is post).
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